How to Control Ejaculatory Reflex

20 min read

How to Control Ejaculatory Reflex

How to Control Ejaculatory Reflex

When it comes to premature ejaculation, your ejaculatory reflex is what’s causing you to cum too quickly. You get in the saddle and start pumping away and it kicks in and you shoot off. Your goal in overcoming premature ejaculation is to gain control before premature ejaculation occurs.

That will cause you to be able to hold out longer and give your partner more pleasure in bed. But how do you do that? After all reflex actions are by their nature impossible to control.

But when it comes to your sexual encounters, you’ll find that there are many things you can do to attain greater control of your pelvic floor muscles, delay orgasm, and get over your male sexual dysfunction once and for all. You’ll find that delaying ejaculation just comes naturally to you.

We are going to spend this article talking about some things you can do to last much longer in bed. It may make premature ejaculation a thing of the past for you forever.

Premature Ejaculation

Premature ejaculation should not bring you down. You should know that up to a third of all men in their 20s and 30 suffer from it. You are not alone. The good news is that most of these men can find ways to beat it and make it a thing of the past.

Premature ejaculation can be physical or psychological. Before you can work on beating premature ejaculation you have to figure out which type you suffer from. That will let you know what methods you can use to bring it under control.

Of course, it may be both physical and psychological in which you’ll have to use a mixture of methods. All the methods we’ll discuss are about mastering your ejaculation reflex. They are designed to make you a better man in bed.

The key element is that premature ejaculation can be a one-time-only thing. Your girl may have just been so hot you couldn’t help yourself. But if you obsess over it it’s likely to happen again.

That’s why you have to take things in hand and beat premature ejaculation as soon as it starts affecting your love life.

Treat Premature Ejaculation

If you have problems with premature ejaculation you are going to want to get it treated quickly – before it begins to define your dating life. Girls talk and if you cum too quickly word will get around.

That’s why it’s important to ask yourself why premature ejaculation is happening and what you can do to stop it. Only once you understand how your body works will you be able to master it and make it not happen anymore.

Do not be afraid to look for help. Premature ejaculation is not a problem that will go away on it’s own. You need to take action to overcome it. Sometimes that will mean seeing a doctor or a sexual psychologist. They are trained to deal with premature ejaculation and help you make it a thing of the past.

So when it comes to treating premature ejaculation don’t be afraid to look for help – it may be your only way out of the issue.

How to Control Ejaculatory Reflex

Delay Ejaculation

The way to overcome premature ejaculation is to learn how to delay your ejaculation. Sounds easy, right? Well, if you are suffering from it you know it’s not a simple thing. It’s going to require time, effort, and patience on your part.

If your premature ejaculation problems are psychological you are going to have to try meditation, changing the way you approach sex, and perhaps talk to a sexual psychologist.

If your premature ejaculation problems are physical, you may be able to treat them on your own. This can be as simple as wearing a condom. Or you may want to try a delay spray or a numbing cream. There are a ton of products on the market that can help you delay ejaculation.

You’ll probably have to try several things before you find the method that works best for you.

Sexual Dysfunction

Premature ejaculation is a male sexual dysfunction. That means it impedes your sex life. After all if you cum right after you enter (or heaven forbid before you enter) your woman she’s not going to be impressed.

It is not the only sexual health issue out there. Many men have it much worse. They suffer from erectile dysfunction – which is the inability to get it up or keep it up. Knowing that might make your premature ejaculation problems not seem quite as bad.

But the thing is you can treat erectile dysfunction and get your sexual function back again in your life. You just have to be patient and try different things and soon you will have complete control of your sexual performance.

Lifelong Premature Ejaculation 

Lifelong premature ejaculation starts out when you are a kid first having sex. You get in the saddle with your first girl, and you shoot off too quickly. This is called primary premature ejaculation.

Then the next time you do it the same thing happens. It begins to become a pattern. You are always shooting off too soon. This can go on for your entire life.

When this happens it’s almost always psychological. You were marked by your first experience with premature ejaculation and now your mind expects it to happen. Therefore, primary premature ejaculation becomes expected.

Because your mind is now wired to anticipate premature ejaculation it’s going to happen every time you try to mount a woman. You’ll be forever known as a two-pump chump.

That’s why if you suffer from lifelong premature ejaculation you are going to need to get into sex therapy to get over the problem. Nothing else will work.

Acquired Premature Ejaculation

This is the second type of premature ejaculation. For years you are fine in bed, maybe even a great lover. Then you suddenly get premature ejaculation, and it sticks around. This is called secondary premature ejaculation.

This can be caused by either physical or mental issues. Try to figure out which one you suffer from and then take action to get over it. It won’t be easy, but you’ll be able to find a way to make a thing of the past.

Remember that you used to be good in bed and can be so again. It just takes a little bit of practice, and you will overcome it. You will delay orgasm until you’re good and ready. That’s why this is called secondary premature ejaculation and not primary premature ejaculation.

Sexual Concerns

Sexual concerns are the number one cause of premature ejaculation. You worry so much about coming too quickly that it becomes a curse. The more you worry about cumming the quicker you are going to cum.

That’s why to take control of your sexual dysfunctions you are going to have to overcome your worries about premature ejaculation.

Tell yourself that it’s not that big a deal. Try meditation to relax. Make your sexual problems a thing of the past and you will be well on your way to treating premature ejaculation.

Prescription Medications

 One to help prevent premature ejaculation is with prescription medications. Many anti-anxiety or anti-depressant medication has the side effect of curing premature ejaculation.

Talk to your doctor about medical treatments and prescription medications you can try to use to control your premature ejaculation problems. He may have a medical treatment that is perfect for you.

One great side effect of meds that treat an underlying health condition is that they will also be sexual medicine. That can help you go a long way towards achieving full orgasm control.

Kegel Exercises

Kegel pelvic floor exercises are a great way to take control of your sexual behavior and overcome premature ejaculation. You hear about women using them a lot but not so much about men.

But men can use Kegel exercises, too. And they are often very effective and helping you hold back when you want to come.

Go into the bathroom the next time you have to pee. Start peeing. Then make yourself stop peeing. Then let yourself pee again. That’s how you know how to find your Kegel muscles.

Now when you don’t have to pee use those muscles. Make it feel like you are making yourself stop peeing. Hold it for 10 seconds and then let go. Now do this 10 times in a row.

Doing these exercises every day should give you greater control of your pelvic floor muscles in a couple of weeks.

Decrease Sensitivity

Another great way to overcome premature ejaculation is to decrease sensitivity. For example, if you usually go bareback slap on a condom and see if that helps with your premature ejaculation problems.

Or you can get a numbing agent or topical anesthetics. These cause your dick to feel less when you are inside and therefore be less likely to cum too fast. They are easy to buy and can add fuel to your sex life.

There are even some you can put inside your condom to make sure that they delay you but don’t numb your partner. This is another one of the most effective ways to control premature ejaculation.

The Stop-Start Technique 

This is a way to train your penis not to cum too quickly. When you first enter your partner, don’t start thrusting. Just let it sit in that little bit of heaven for a few seconds.

Then make a couple of thrusts. Then stop and leave it inside for a bit longer. Then do a couple more thrusts. You should know from experience how many thrusts you can do without cumming.

Keep this up and you’ll find yourself lasting much longer. The key is to get yourself close to orgasm, then stop to calm down, and then to start going again.

This will train your brain to not let you control ejaculation during penetrative sex. The stop-start technique has worked for thousands of guys and it can work for you.

Keep the stop-start technique in your playbook.

The Squeeze Technique

The squeeze technique is a novel therapeutic approach that has helped lots of en with performance anxiety. When you use the squeeze technique you are training your body not to cum so quickly.

To use the squeeze technique, enter your partner. Then start pumping away. When you feel yourself about to cum pull out and squeeze right below the base of your penis. This should stop your need to cum.

Then you can enter her again and start fucking one more time. Again, when you feel like you are going to need to cum pull out and use the squeeze technique again. Over time this will train you not to cum so quickly.

Vaginal Penetration Is Not the Only Sex There Is

When men think of sex, we think of an actual penis in vagina fucking. But when women think of sex they think about a lot more things than that.

That’s because only 18% of women can cum from vaginal sex alone. Some women can’t cum from vaginal sex at all.

For those women, it’s all about the clit. Think about what you can do to stimulate the clit without vaginal penetration. You can finger it. You can go down on it. You can tease it.

All of this you can do without ever sticking it in. And then once she’s cum – and if you work her right, she will cum – then you can stick it in, and she won’t care at all how long you last.

That’s a great way to make yourself not worry about premature ejaculation – which will help you overcome it because you’ll be a lot less worried about it.

Over The Counter Remedies for Premature Ejaculation

 There are numerous over the counter remedies for premature ejaculation. Some will work for you. Some will not.

The best thing about over the counter remedies for premature ejaculation is that you can pick them up without going to the doctor. You can remain anonymous.

Over the counter remedies for premature ejaculation range from condoms designed to numb your penis to cock rings to desensitizing sprays and creams. You should have enough sense of self to know what remedies are going to be right for you.

So go to the pharmacy or your local sex shop and pick up the over the counter remedy that you think will work for you and get ready to try it out. It just may work.

Sexual Intimacy

Real sexual intimacy is slow. It is not orgasm-driven.

Do you jackhammer when you get inside pussy? Stop it. Yes, it looks good in porn. But it’s not what real sexually active women are looking for. There are other factors, but more often than not they are looking for a slow, caring lover.

Taking a step back, embracing an intimate take, and moving at a slower pace may just help you delay ejaculation. And it will certainly make your partner happier in bed.

Treat Depression If You Have It

 A lot of guys think that suffering from depression is a weakness they have to hide. It isn’t. It’s something that just happens to some people from time to time. It’s a medical disorder just like any other.

And the thing is that it can lead to premature ejaculation. That’s why if you are suffering from it you need to treat depression as soon as it hits you. When you take care of psychological factors, you are also treating your premature ejaculation problem.

Go to your doctor and tell him you want to treat your depression. He or she will have some medication that can help you out. They may also suggest you spend some time talking with a shrink.

There is nothing wrong with that. When you treat depression, you are enhancing your entire life. Don’t be afraid of it.

Behavioral Therapy

Behavioral therapy is a great way to overcome premature ejaculation. To start behavioral therapy, you’ll have to make an appointment with a sexual therapist.

He or she will map out a specific behavioral therapy for you to use to overcome premature ejaculation and take control of your ejaculatory reflex.

Before they do that, they will spend some time talking to you about what has led to your premature ejaculation. Be as honest with them as possible. Only then will you get the right type of treatment you need.

Behavioral therapy can be a godsend to dudes who suffer from premature ejaculation. Don’t be afraid of it.

Academic Research Institutions

Academic research institutions are always looking for new ways to treat premature ejaculation. They do so because they know it is one of the most common things dudes suffer from.

These academic research institutions tend to publish their findings online on a regular basis. That means that there are always new ways to treat premature ejaculation that are popping up.

You can google the work of these academic research institutions fairly easily. You can even subscribe to some of their journals. Just the act of reading about ways to take control of your ejaculatory reflex can help make premature ejaculation a thing of the past.

Don’t be afraid to find out what academic research institutions have found out lately about premature ejaculation.

Topical Creams

We mentioned topical creams before. And yes, they are a great way to take control of your premature ejaculation issues.

That said not all topical creams are created equal. Some are absorbed into your skin. That’s good because it will numb you but not your partner.

Others simply stay on your dick. Which means they are getting into and on your partner. That means these topical creams will numb her out too. That’s not a good thing. It will mean much less sexual satisfaction for her.

Make sure you get a cream that numbs you but not your partner.

Sexual Activity

 If you are experiencing premature ejaculation and temporary loss of control in bed, it’s important to look at the type of sexual activity you are having.

To be blunt if your mind knows that the type of sex you are having is not the type of sex you should be having it will make you ejaculate prematurely as a defense mechanism.

Look very closely and honestly at the type of sexual activity you are having. If it is the wrong type or with the wrong people switching to the type of people you should be having sex with will very quickly clear up any premature ejaculation problems, you may be having.

Stop Premature Ejaculation

You can stop premature ejaculation. You have to understand that deep in your soul. Look dude other people have managed to stop premature ejaculation. So, you know you can too.

Trying to stop premature ejaculation is the most important step. It will help you take back control of your life.

And simply making those first steps may help you overcome it. For a lot of guys, premature ejaculation is completely psychological. Feeling like you are doing something to stop premature ejaculation can be a cure in and of itself.

So give it a try. You can stop premature ejaculation.



Gaining control of your ejaculatory reflex can be done. First, you have to figure out if it is physical or psychological.

Then you need to find a treatment method that will work for you. It may take some trial and error, but you can figure out how to control premature ejaculation.

But you have to take the first steps. Once you do you will find a way to make premature ejaculation a thing of the past.

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